dia de los muertos

Honoring the Days of the Dead around these parts, and hoping you are feeling that sense of connectedness with your ancestors and passed over loved ones. If you are looking for a guided way to honor the dead, join me on November 1st for Cacao Ceremony & Muertos journey. We will first partake in the sacred cacao, then move into a shamanic journey to connect with the dead—whether it is your passed over parent or loved one, your grandparents, ancestors you never met, but want to connect with or a famous artist, sacred figure or philosopher, thinker or religious figure, join me on Friday for our circle.

Lots of bonuses with this one, including a how to guide for your ofrenda, how to make a cup of cacao, how to bake pan muerto or sugar skulls, and of course the healing work we do together in circle. Everything is recorded if you cannot attend live. Until then, enjoy this playlist I pulled together for Dia de los Muertos.

Shamanic Journey with a Skull

Through my time as an earth medicine practitioner, I have developed intimate relationships with the crystals and tools that have come to me. I consider myself an Earth Medicine Keeper, meaning that I often will find medicine of the Earth, like feathers, bones, skulls, crystals, tools, artwork, and altar pieces. I am exceedingly good at hypervigilance when I am out and about in the world, probably one of those residuals from trauma that serves me in my field. I notice small movements, like animals on the forest floor. I point out the toads, salamanders, birds, feathers, and animals camouflaged in their natural habitats. I find patterns in the things, which is an excellent skill set for finding a four-leaf clover, which I am also very good at. This isn’t even a humble brag, this is a brag brag. Because, let’s face it, sometimes it is good to know what you are good at. Being able to see a discrepancy in the force offers me a opening to gather medicine for my clients. Side note: I am also awesome at this at Yard Sales, Thrift Shops and antique malls for all those interested in a buddy or shopper.

I find many pieces for my work in the most unlikeliest of places. I take them home, and clean them. I house them, and consistently cleanse, clear and clean until they are ready for meditation or journey work. Then I journey with the piece to find out how I can best work with this medicine and how it wants to work with me. Sometimes I pass the medicine on, if it was meant for a client. I actually am starting to resell, recycle, and upcycle my finds for my online shop.

So, what is a shamanic journey? Well, journey is a practice best described as a lucid trance state. In the alpha state, it's akin to meditation. In the theta state, the deeper level of transmission, more akin to the dream state. In this way, we visualize and communicate with our medicine and guides much more easily. Intelligence comes through the sensory processes and is later interpreted cognitively.

My questions are often the same ilk—why did you come to me? Are you personal medicine or medicine I will use with clients? What messages do you have? How would you like me to work with you? How can I best honor you and keep you?

In Spring of 2023, my bestie Sharon Muzio and I took a trip to Columcile Megalith in Bangor, Pennsylvania. It is a standing stone Celtic park that is not only beautiful, but sacred and holy. It was an awesome weekend away, and we decided to check out a few crystal shops in the area, as you do when you are witchy bad asses with a rainy day. I found this incredible shop called Celestial Journeys in Stroudsburg, PA. It seems to be permanently closed now, which is so sad, because she had an incredible selection of crystals and offerings.

I went in there looking for nothing, and then we made eye contact with a skull that was white. It looked like bone, almost. When I saw it, I thought it looked like Ocean Jasper, definitely in my top five crystals of all time. One of the things I love about Ocean Jasper is its connection to the Earth, and healing work. Each piece is entirely different from another, but they often have markings that  look like cells almost. I kept walking back over to it in the case, not touching it yet, but just watching it. The consciousness of it felt palpable. I couldn’t not think of this skull as I walked around the store. Finally, I went back and asked the owner Janine what it was. She told me it was fossilized coral.

Hmmm…interesting.

Fossilized coral skull. Of course, the little corals are going to look like bones. I assumed it had limestone with it, and my goodness, it was so cool. I decided this was Spirit urging me to connect with a Crystal Skull.

Now, I did have a skull at the time—a black Obsidian skull that I worked with for ancestral healing work, and my altars for Ancestor. My beautiful friend Lisa D’Arrigo sent me a gorgeous little Cherry Jasper skull that I worked with when I was healing from my double mastectomy in 2021. But this Skull felt different, like it was here to teach and work with me.

I didn’t immediately jump into journey with the Skull. I spent the days preceding my journey day prepping. I made baños. Cleared and cleansed with skull with drum, rattle, and burning herbs. I set aside a whole day for journeywork, and this was part of that day. I took a long ceremonial bath in dead sea salt water and prepared for a long journey with the Skull. I brought it to my bed, and set myself up with pillows and Icaros, the Central and South American songs used during Ayahuasca and other medicine. journeys. Now, one of my goals was to develop a relationship with the medicine—specifically with the skull.

Every skull keepers I know who have deep meaningful relationships with their skulls seemed to know their name, their medicine, channeling the wisdom of the Crystal Skull. So, that was one of my questions: What is your name? Then deeper:

• What work do you want to do through me?

• Why did you come to me?

• Are you personal medicine or medicine I will use with clients?

• What messages do you have?

• How would you like me to work with you?

• How can I best honor you and keep you?

As I began, I seemed plunged into a world with many layers and levels, different outlooks, but it was all fluorescent and changeable. And I continued to try to be grounded in a journey on the land, but it was somewhere between ether and space. It reminded me of the movie Tron. But as I explored, and frustratingly was trying to direct my journey, I kept asking the question, I am here to know your name. Tell me what Medicine you have for me. It was just the Icaros and the place that could be very large or very small.

Why are you asking me my name?

The Skull began speaking. And it continued as colors and shapes, nebula and sacred geometry was all around me. “I used to have a whole universe in me and you are asking if I have a human name.”

Suddenly, I could see all this nebulous color and shape come into focus. It was a coral reef, so deep and long and intricate. It was like watching a movie on speed 4x, except the 4 were years, millennia, really. I could see the life cycle of plants and anemones and fish—their babies, their babies’ babies, birth, life, mate, death, and then birth, life, mate and death, over and over and I could see the eating of fish my other fish and the gentleness of the animals in and around the coral. The whole of the coral reef was a universe where certain fish and plants spent their whole life. The Skull repeated itself, “I used to be an entire universe. You can never fully grasp what that means. You can never understand with your ways unless you want to. You humans just want to possess things. You take me out the Earth, cut me out of the womb again, after my life cycle being a universe, from the place where I lived, and then you take me and carve me into your image and ask me my name, like I am happy to be here looking like a human.”

“You shaped me to be you. You carved me in your image, to look human, but I am anything but human. I had a universe in me and around me the likes you will never understand and you dare to ask me what my human name is. I am everything. I am the Earth. I am the universe..”

At first, I had that sarcastic defeating Gen X voice in me, “Figures I’d get the angry little skull.”

The Skull continued to talk, “You are asking the wrong questions. You are asking me my name. How you work with me? These are petty human concerns.” I could still see the coral extending out into the sea, and housing all the life cycles.

What the skull taught me is that Earth Medicine isn’t us, we cannot project our humanness onto the Earth. It doesn’t have a consciousness like ours. The Earth doesn’t pull things out of its environment and expect it to thrive and teach and be wise and understand humanity. The Coral taught me about community and interconnectedness, and showed me, more than meditation or writing about (which I had to do for my Level 3 shamanic training) ever could communicate—we must dismantle the myth of separation. Not only is the Coral the Sea, but it is also the Earth. It is the fish it housed. It is the salt, the plants, the limestone. It is me. It is you.

My line of question was very me-centeric. I was asking the questions about what I had just bought, That in and of itself was problematic to him. When I asked, what's your name? How do you want to work with me? It was all me, me, me, me. I wanted a cool story. I wanted to channel the medicine. But the Skull was like, all righty, well, let's get you in line here. And it was interesting. He showed me the universes that exist on the Earth, and that right now, you are no different Angie. There are universes around all things.

I am a human. I wanted what I wanted when I wanted it. And he was basically saying, this is how you work with me. Learn about me, learn about the earth. I am the medicine of the earth. So, in the end, this tempermental coral skull was not moody at all, but honest and wise. He teaches me every day about how to work with the earth medicine and not how to possess it or use it and be an ally to it. We are in service to the medicine, not the other way around. Humility and walking the beauty way can help soften tough relationships with the medicine and the Earth, which continues to struggle with heat and climate change. I was asking its name, but that was decidedly the wrong question. The question I should be asking is Would you please show me the way of the Earth?

In the end, that is what I do. I'm an earth medicine practitioner and I was asking a Coral Skull, “In what ways are you human? How do you be more human? What kind of human ways can you help me with?” But that is not the medicine of the Earth—it about the wisdom of the animal, the plant, the plant.

As I have explored my unnamed Crystal Skull, I researched coral, because of course, I did. Cool Coral factoids:

• Coral grow by biomineralization, a process that starts when the young coral polyp uses seawater to create calcium carbonate crystals.

• Corals worldwide, no matter if they live in the ocean or in a tank, bloom at the same time. They communicate no matter where they are in the world.

• Coral reefs only take up 0.0025 % of the earth's surface but they, along with other marine organisms are responsible for producing 50% of the earth oxygen.

• They also absorb nearly one-third of the carbon dioxide generated from burning fossil fuels.

• Synchronized mass coral spawning typically occurs several days after a full moon once a year.

I bought my Skull and continue to build a deep relationship with its medicine. He comes in one form or another in every session I have. I mostly keep him on my altar and honor his medicine. As we have softened and taught me more about working with the Earth, our work together seems one of the most important medicine journeys ever.

Do you have a skull? Tell me about it in the comments! Also, let me know how you loved Skull Week, and I can’t wait to explore more topics with you. If you love my deep dives, consider asking me a question to cover in my next podcast episode, which is a Q&A episode. Send your question via email either written or you can send an audio file to angie (at) themoonandstone (dot) com.

Lion's Gate Portal

THIS EVENT IS CURRENTLY FILLED. THANK YOU FOR YOUR INTEREST. GET ON THE MAILING LIST FOR MORE EVENTS. SIGN UP HERE.

Episode 44: Tarot+ Earth Medicine Reading for February 2023

Enjoy the tarot + earth medicine reading for February 2023

rebirth

I have been thinking about rebirth so much these past few weeks, maybe even months, as the animals of rebirth began appearing for our monthly journeys in the Spring. Jaguar showed up first, the Queen of Shadow work and the one who often appears for dismemberment, then Snake, the shedder of skin and the symbol of transformation, and then in August, Beetle came…a small guide of rebirth who turns literal shit to nourishment, recycling our difficult experiences into powerful spiritual lessons. My personal work with Vulture prepares me, of course, intimately connecting to death and rebirth.

Through this entire process with breast cancer, it has felt like the end of a dis-ease, not the beginning. A personal invitation to be reborn into the healed Angie, the one who has done the work. That might sound strange, but it felt like the culmination of many years of working through trauma, grief, soul loss, and heart chakra imbalances. Like there is this part of you—over the heart, that has manifested cancer in my milk ducts. Interestingly, the cancer developed in a breast I was never able to produce milk out of. That is not exactly true. The milk was produced, but it could not be expressed. (Is that a metaphor or what?) I had a child who died, and I remember how engorged and painful my breasts were, filled with milk and no child to drink. I put huge cabbage leaves on it, until they withered and I smelled like an Eastern European soup. I would cry in the shower as my breasts would weep milk. Except the right one. It would just stay hard and engorged and no milk would weep until it just stopped trying.

During those days, I often thought about this class on Death and Dying in college with one of my mentors Dr. John Raines. He said that babies cry because they know they deserve food, comfort and love. And the cry, he explained, was exactly designed to be uncomfortable for humans, it is a noise we want to stop. It is only when they cry and no one comes that babies stop crying. My breasts were the same. They eventually stopped weeping milk because no baby came to feed.

It is interesting that this tidbit came from a class on Death and Dying. We have those moments we face death both metaphorically and literally. Maybe we survive a great trauma that threatened our life, or we stand and face our demons and get sober, or we ask for a new way to be in the world. In the process of earth medicine initiation, we undergo the process of rebirth through the shamanic experience of dismemberment, where, in the journey state, we literally ask our animals to rip us apart, tearing at us, killing us in journey, so that we may rebirth. With Vulture as my guide, she asked me to release my soul. She could not tear me apart alive. This process of releasing brought up so many emotions and feelings of helplessness that had permeated my life…how do I let go when all I have been doing is holding on tight? It is a zen koan, a paradox for survivors. Somehow I did, though. That is the thing…somehow we do. We do it when the holding on is killing us.

When I had my first chakra balancing many many years ago, my heart was completely closed. The pendulum did not move. It just stood stock still. It disturbed me. I had learned through my many years of life how to shut my heart off. Immediately, the self-punishing thoughts flooded in. “Oh my God, I am broken. My heart is shut. I am a monster.” (This is why I teach my students to be kind and gentle when doing a chakra balancing.) It has been decades-long work to open my heart and to trust people. It was well before I became a healer that I started, but I knew then that the pendulum was telling me something I needed to pay attention to. Opening my heart involved many healers, many therapists, many releases, many times feeling so vulnerable and fearful that I took steps backward and then when I was ready, started back on the path.

I say this because there is no healer that isn’t a wounded healer. Our DNA, our strength as healers comes from our wounds. It comes from our humanness, not our divinity or otherworldliness. While I appreciate there are many who feel shadow work is not as important as light work, I politely, yet adamantly, beg to differ. Any lightwork done without being aware of your wounds ultimately will take you back on the same path again and again. You encounter the same lessons, the same kinds of people (friends, lovers, colleagues, enemies.) Our wounds are invisible blocks that keep us in an eternal loop on the spiritual path, like Sisyphus, the Greek King who cheated death twice and was forced to roll a huge boulder up a hill, only to watch it roll back down. Sisyphus’s story has come to represent any futile, yet difficult task. Unless, we can identify our own triggers, wounds, and blocks; make them visible then dismantle them, we stay in this endless Sisyphean cycle. This is the rebirth. To simply emerge from the tedious work, to slowly break down that rock, our wounds into smaller pieces, so then we can break that cycle. Then our journey isn't so tedious.

Where shamanic and earth medicine work excel is in the rituals, ceremonies, symbolic work of that rebirth. We call in the snake, the beetle, the vulture to help us find a way to break our cycles. This work is a lifelong process. I have been intimately involved with this trauma work and work around my own heart for so long it is almost comical, but also I didn’t start it to be a good healer or to write a newsletter or blog post. I started it because that heart, the one closed and unable to weep, demanded I look at it. This petulant, hurt child within me said, “I cannot be ignored any longer. I will not be neglected. I need to be loved.” It began crying and I began responding. And in turn, I healed those around me, who tried to get into that closed heart for years.

Self-care and self-love sound like such bullshit terms, but they are juicy, deep, life-altering journeys. They aren’t just bubble baths and dark chocolate and masturbation. Self-love embodies self-compassion, self-care, self-worth, and self-actualization. We must remother ourselves, or refather ourselves. That has been the challenge—seeing and loving myself unconditionally. But when I struggle, I look at my own children and think, "You are just like them--beautiful, perfect, worthy of care."

It is strange to see my body without breasts. I don't NOT like it. It is just an adjustment. I am almost starting to like it more. I have been trying to take some time with no bra and no shirt to just get used to how I look now—a huge scar running across the place where my babies suckled. My belly sticks out like a big Buddha belly and my chest goes in, almost concave. Right now it is all puckered and there are major folds in it that are angry and tight. They will soften over time. Just like the other scars I have healed in my life—things soften with time. I can honestly say that I feel complete, even without my breasts. This body does not seem ugly, or unlovable, or unworthy at all. It is simply an adjustment.

This is what healing gives you—unconditional radical self-acceptance. I have been working on it for years by demanding I love myself. I thought that if I just said it enough, wrote it out on enough intentions, it would happen, but the truth is—that isn't what did it. You are not in control of the healing timeline. It is something you cannot fake. You simply love yourself until you are willing to accept the love. That's the thing--for me, self-love was about accepting the love, not giving it. Giving love was easy for me, but accepting it was a whole other thing altogether. You become gentle with your inner voice. One day something weird happens—you get diagnosed with breast cancer, or your partner leaves you, or you notice that your face is wrinkled and your hair grey, or you break something valuable and through this long rebirthing process you realize you aren't mad at you, or disappointed, or embarrassed, or ashamed. You stand tall and you say, “Yep, that is me, still me, still the same me as yesterday, still worthy of love and acceptance. I love you. You got this, kid.”

You got this, kid. I love you.

Mothering Grief and Humanizing Healing: A podcast convo with the Biz Bruja

Though I live in the middle of Pennsylvania, we have some amazing healers, practitioners and leaders in the global psychic and healing community. I work alongside one of the strongest channelers of energy with my healing companion Sharon Muzio, the owner of Alta View Wellness Center. Sharon leads the Spirit of Oneness Holistic Expo too, which is the largest spiritual gathering we have in Harrisburg. Vanessa and I are both present in this circle. We mention Sharon in this episode, so just want to give her a shout-out. Because Vanessa touches on this a bit in the beginning, we live in a community that feels small compared to New York City, but we have a vibrant community of gifted healers here. And the beautiful thing about being in a smaller community is that we find each other—the brujas and curanderas and mystics and medicine people.

When Vanessa Codorniu came to one of my circles, her dynamic, earnest energy lit up the room. She had been working in the huge community of New York City doing shamanic work, psychic work and ancestral healing. She had just moved to our community, and we have been fan-girling each other ever since. I take her circles. She takes mine. I have been blessed to have her in my circle of friends and healer colleagues. She is a gifted practitioner, circle leader, psychic and more. This conversation was so rich and expansive. it is because we speak the same language. She is not afraid of a little shadow and magick. She had interviewed me for this podcast in December, so pre-COVID-19. I want to say that because we mention nothing about what is happening in the world. I think we would have a very different conversation today. But I love the conversation we did have. We had some connectivity issues, so if you hear a blip or two, it clears up in a second.

I hope you enjoy this conversation with me and Vanessa. Let me know what you think by dropping a comment below, or sending me an email at angie@themoonandstone.com.

New Year Visioning Retreat

The winter always stirs me into a creative frenzy. I want to organize and simplify after the holidays. I empty containers, pots, jars, drawers, small boxes...anything I have mindlessly put something into at some point in the hustle and bustle of autumn. I go through things, read the notes I wrote months ago, and to-do lists, then throw them out. (Goddess, that feels so bloody good!) Releasing, organizing and de-cluttering might not sound creative, but right after I am done with that work, the muse fills me, and I must create. Nature abhors a vacuum as we say, and I just want to fill this emptying with artwork and writing. 

This is the time I energetically decide what I keep for the new year, and what I am ready to release. What is ready for release? What is ready for more of my energy? The problem with this process is that it is just me in my head, and I have been living with this stuff all year. It is hard to see the tree through the forest. All my stuff seems important or it wouldn't be my stuff! Sometimes you just need another set of eyes, another perspective, to remind you of what is redundant, what is extraneous, what is holding you back from a lightness of being. 

The work for me is never about bringing in what I want. I know who I am and what I want. Maybe too much. I'm a leader, and a go-getter. I tend to have big dreams and enjoy projects, work, and offering myself to others.  In fact, I often overschedule, over-do, overwork...this isn't always a good thing. I often have this nagging feeling that I am forgetting something, or that there just isn't enough time in this life for everything I want to do. And then in my darkest hours, the statement that haunts me, "I'm not doing enough!" What I do well is surround myself with people who challenge me. Not just friends, but a few strong spiritual advisors, and I also pay for support in the way of therapy, coaching, and healers who help me clarify, simplify, and re-prioritize my life in the most important ways. All this asking for help and direction has also informed what kinds of offerings I supply to others. If I need it, certainly other people need it. 

After taking part in a Sankalpa retreat many years ago, I connected and understood my soul path so clearly that everything I envisioned, drew, and journaled that one day more than five years ago has come to pass. I can see how so much of what I visioned in that day clarified what is important to me, and what was standing the way of achieving it. Because of that day and my own struggles with simplifying and distilling what is important to me through other healers and coaches, I began offering New Year Visioning Retreat day at Alta View Wellness Center. This is the fourth year offering this vision board workshop. But it is SO MUCH MORE than just a vision board class.

I combine my studies in crystal healing, earth medicine, shamanic practices, art, tarot, meditation, and circle leading in all I do, but this workshop particularly reflects it. Watching people create vision boards these last three years only strengthened my resolve that setting intention in sacred space intensifies the spiritual work, creates a fertile place to manifest any intention and amplifies the creative fire for others. It creates a higher vibration and higher consciousness so we can achieve our beautiful goals. Most of us don't want to be rock stars, or write the Great American novel, but some of us do. For those with intentions of the peaceful, small-life variety, or those with big, meaty, lofty goals, I created this workshop to help you first figure out what is holding you back and then what you are ready to bring in. 

We start the day in meditation and prayer, circle up. I drum and guide you in shamanic journey, and guided visioning through writing. We move here and there to find more creative flow. The energy of the morning is being in a waking trance state, almost, in and out of journey world, to write. I simply ask questions to spark your deepest wants and desires. From that spark, you begin to stoke a fire within you--the one that holds your truths and intentions. As we move through the morning, we journal as simply as possible. (What are you ready to release? What do want for your health, for your friendships, for your romantic life, for your work, for you?) And we uncover and distill what is most important to you and how to achieve it.

After our morning of visioning, we eat clean, homecooked food lovingly prepared by me. I cook vegetarian soups and salads for us. This is a retreat, after all, and I want you to feel cared for and loved. So all my food is created with love and Reiki. 

Then we move into our time creating a vision board to hold the visions of the morning. Whether you want a new couch, a new job or a new perspective, we help you find photos, words, and images to hold your intentions and release anything standing in your way of the best you. This process takes most of the day. It is amazing how quickly the time flies. We laugh so much, and talk, and share space with other people also ready to make shifts in their life. If you have more questions, or want to register, just give me a call, 717-770-9109.